Are you Unacceptably Ugly?

From the Satirical Times:

National Countdown 2005: The party organized for the Unacceptably Ugly banned!
Police rejects licence, saying event is likely to be a party for the Unacceptably Ugly and is against public interest

A Countdown party, organized for the past two years by local subsidiary of a Singapore-based media company consisting of Unacceptably Ugly artistes, has had its licence application for this year's party turned down.

Police rejected the application for the National Countdown 2005 outdoor party, which was to be held at the Sentosa island resort over the New Year's Day weekend, saying 'the event is likely to be organised as an Unacceptably Ugly people's party which is contrary to public interest'.

The application was put up by Mediacock, the same company that organised the Starry Awards in December.

In a statement to the media, the police said they had approved events such as the Starry Awards after receiving assurance that the events would not be 'organised with only Unacceptably Ugly artistes involved'.

However, they said they noticed Unacceptably Ugly 'seen openly kissing and intimately touching each other' during the Starry Awards.

The police also said some Unacceptably Ugly artistes were using toilets meant for the Good Looking, 'suggesting that most of the patrons were probably Unacceptably Ugly and that the event was almost exclusively for them'.

These 'open acts' of Unacceptably Ugliness at the Starry Awards also provoked several complaints from other patrons.

Miss See Beh Heow who attended the award ceremony said: "I understand that these people are unfortunately born freaking ugly. I don't discriminate against them. But they shouldn't be allowed to show their fugly faces mah. Scary one you know."

Said the police: "The police recognize that there are some Singaporeans that are just Unacceptably Ugly. While the police do not discriminate against Unacceptably Ugly people on this basis, we recognise that Singapore is still, by and large, a conservative and traditional society that judges people based on appearances. Besides, since we are going to build conservative and traditional casinos soon, we really don't need the Unacceptably Ugly dollar anymore."

They have promised to scrutinise applications for any similar events in the future.

PS: A little article that was inspired by a particular email from a particular Kenny.